It’s compatibility not love

It’s compatibility not love ..

Strange how the mind can wander to infinite thoughts even when you are in an active conversation. It happens to me mostly, so much so that I usually have an alternate conversation going on in my mind. At times when both the lines of conversation are parallel, I might come up with some humor, wit or a pointed response.

This wandering trait of mine manifested again tonight as I was in conversation with a female friend (wd explain why I mention the gender) the conversation happened on whatsapp and acquired various tangents which lead me to think that relationship these days are more about compatibility than love.

I read an interesting piece on a website about gender specific views on relationship n sex and wanted to discuss the same so I whatsapped this friend who I knew would be forthright n is a good conversationalist. We began discussing few aspects like what makes a relationship tick? Importance of physical intimacy n how differently men n women perceive relationships..

The conversation was very interesting n soon turned from a generic one to a more personal one. Now, I v been friends with her for almost two years n knew that she had a bad break up but partly due to my negligence n partly giving respect to her privacy I never knew the details apart from knowing the guy’s name. This discussion, however, once on a personal note, brought out the story and at different points I identified with the guy. All said and done the guy was looking for and getting companionship from the girl while she was investing herself emotionally and thought it was love.

But wait a minute .. They had kissed … They were certainly not trying to get cosy n have some fun. they were not in a steadfast relationship. It just happened. And while that to me sounded normal given the circumstances they were in, to the lady (gender reference) it signalled an intent for a relationship. (genders think differently, not justifying, merely stating ) subsequently, when things got ugly, it triggered the sense of betrayal..

That’s when a tangent of thought went towards exploring what might have transpired. The guy sought companionship n got along with the beautiful sympathiser my friend turned out to be. When she learnt that there was no future for them she ended up feeling hurt n betrayed.. Two different kinds of people but not compatible with each other. Compatible in the sense what they wanted from eachother and their relationship. Not wanting the same thing perhaps lead to the acrimony.

It’s always easier to pass a righteous judgement when presented with a story. I have done the same here and without being prejudiced, I would say the lesson is to be with a person who you share a wavelength with. Be friends, because friends are always compatible n let love follow …



5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. My Say
    May 20, 2013 @ 20:03:55

    very thoughtful read ! while love remains a mysterious emotion to me..I am not contradicting any thought expressed here yet I would still say .. its all upto us.. we can mend any relation or be compatible with anyone we wish to. πŸ™‚


  2. contoursoflife
    May 20, 2013 @ 20:10:22


    Thanks for reading. u r absolutely right .. its all upto us and all relationships can be mended, provided the intent to revive the relationship is mutual πŸ™‚


  3. namrota
    May 21, 2013 @ 13:40:58

    Compatibility is about how two people accept each other despite the other person’s short comings .. in-spite of the differences and certainly not how they think or act on the same lines.

    A well written post πŸ™‚


  4. Babitha
    Jul 11, 2013 @ 00:49:36

    Interesting πŸ™‚


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